Don sent me this lady.
The tits are a bit bigger, hair a bit shorter, but she looks like my girlfriend I had when I was a senior in high school back in ’79, crazy full-goose bozo bitch.
“crazy full-goose bozo bitch”, spit beer on my monitor LMFAO!!!! Brilliant!
So THAT’S where you’ve been hiding the future mother of my children!
HASH-TAG (#): COGRATS TO THE FROGS WITH HUGE BALLS OUR KENYAN LEADER LACKS, AND WHO KNOCKED OFF THE 3 MOOSLIMES WHO WERE DEFENDING THE PEDOPHILE MOHAMMED….PISS BE UPON HIM.
Actually, I’m kinda confused cause in my day it was called a “pound sign”. but I must move on. Oh yea, has anyone ever seen a Frog’s balls?
Hummmm, Blue eyes, smooth skin, blonde(ish) hair and very very sexy legs doth make this damsel very delectable. Unfortunately, her mammaries do saggeth and her aureoles doth spread over her tits like Ebola over Sierra Leone. Oh well, at my age I can’t be too choosy and my dedication to DDP is heightened by my lust for this lady. Never fear, DDP there exists no lady on this planet who would tear me from your loving arms.
OK, it’s time to “Rock & Roll”.
1) Face: Topped by a mane of almost blonde hair her face is angelic. I am mesmerized by her light blue eyes and innocent smile. Yea, sometime faux innocence is more alluring than an overt sexual exposure. Her appearance of youth lends to the look of a High School cheerleader right after a 3 hour coupling with the school’s 1st string football team. Maybe that’s why she’s squatting. You know like draining the oil from your car’s engine after 10,000 miles. That residue should leave a barren area the size of a pitcher’s mound on the ground under her. Rating: “A+”.
2) Boobage: They gotta be Mother Nature’s creation. No plastic surgeon would leave his or her creation sagging like the nut-sack of an 85 year old Florida retiree living in a Jewish “nudist camp”. OY, them boobs, sadly, are not up to the standards the rest of her body is held to. Add to that the aureoles large enough to inflate and float the battle ship Arizona make this rating painful. Rating: “C”.
3) Skin/Torso/Arms: Ok, we’re back to high mark territory. Her skin is absolutely silky smooth and the milky hue of thy lady’s dermis, which has not been turned into a buffalo hide texture by hours exposed to the sun’s rays is a wonder to behold. Although her squatting position hides most of her torso the little I see is firm and well maintained. I like her upper appendages could be slight more toned. Not muscular but firm, but they certainly are acceptable enough. Rating: “A”.
4) Legs: AH, my favorite female body parts. If she were standing I could spend hours in a hypnotic trance scanning from her perfect ankles to her upper thighs. Alas, her bent knees slightly hide the perfect beauty of those wonderful specimens. Having said that, her knees, being probably the sexiest part of her gorgeous gams are exposed for all the hethrosexual oriented males to admire. In fact, having bended knee intercourse has long been a favorite amongst many tribes on New Guinea. It’s practiced as a “birth control” method that is almost 100% effective and the only downside are sticky calves until the young aborigine lady dives into a fast flowing stream. I’ll get into the intricate details at another time. Long, lean and flawless her legs are wonderful and deserve high marks. Rating: “A++”.
Toejam overall rating: “A+”.
Yup the sagging boobage resulted in a lower mark, but after a short session with Dr. Finkelstein she’ll be reassessed and probably hit the triple “+” mark without any problem.
We’ve just had 4 days of near 0 degrees night time temperatures and I’m thinking of paying DDP a surprise visit in her California paradise abode. The warmth of the soft Pacific zephyrs will comfort the cockles of my heart and DDP’s 5 “+” body will comfort and raise my loins to the boiling point. I can’t wait. And besides my anatomically correct, full size blow-up doll is in the shop for repair. Instead of using air to inflate her I tried to fill her with warm water to keep the cold air at bay. Unfortunately, I didn’t read the manufacturer’s warning and she literally melted in my arms.
Hang on DDP I’m packing up my old kit bag and it may be a long way to Tipperary, California but I’ll be there before you can say: “Wham-Bam-Shazam”!
Awww poor freezing Toejam….come to Malibu, and I’ll warm you up! It’s been quite warm here in the evenings. We could lie out on the beach, naked under the stars….
Just the thought of that fantastic beach tryst has my trusty pocket rocket’s engine revving! 🙂
I’m on my way get the blanket ready cause beach sand and lusty, moist body parts don’t mix well.
Awww Toejam~ You forget, I have a cabana. You’ve been away too long…
Pant, pant, freakin pant!!!
DDP, you’re the only woman I know who can make me reach an orgasmic pinnacle from 3,000 miles with my hands tied behind my back.
I love you with all my heart & soul and I don’t care who knows it!
Thank you, Don & Denny. I don’t ever remember seein’ anything on the sidewalk in my neighborhood. I guess that since there ain’t no sidewalks where I live now, I’ll never see her.
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