A little late but better late than never. I see A/D has sent us another babe wearing bazunga mega-veils. Her aureoles are about the same size as the main entry hatch cover on the International space station. Oh, will this display of obscenity and disrespect for proper female anatomy ever end? Ah, I spy some very alluring features that may offset the boob baggage, however. I got a date shortly with the local convenience shop owner. He’s renting me some space above the lady’s room and I have to check it out and locate a spot to drill the “eye-spy-in-the-sky peep-hole.
1) FACE: Typical porn beauty. That hair looks like it was purchased at the local Dollar Store. After all Halloween is only 6 weeks away and the faux hair pieces are currently in abundance. Eyes and nose are her finer features. Transplant them to Justin Bieber’s mug and you’ll never tell the difference. OMFG, those bloated lips. How’d they get oversized? Plastic surgeon? Tootin on a Johnson? Munching carpets? Probably all of the above. Rating: “B-“.
2) BOOBAGE: Au Naturale as I suspect and not bad either. The down side is her aureoles and that mole canker on the side of her left boob. Maybe her boy/girlfriend is blind and uses it as sort of a braille to locate the tit. Who knows, but it is distracting to one with 20/20 vision. Rating: “B”.
3) TORSO: Ah ha. Finally we get to the creme de la creme of this damsel’s bod. Her mid-section is really nice. Slim, toned and the way it’s displayed makes me shiver in delight. This one part of the lady’s anatomy may put her in the “A” category. Perhaps it’s the juxtaposition of her 38-D boobs that enhances her tummy, but whatever the reason for such a fine display gets her a high rating. And that perfect “innie” that’s perfectly capable of holding the spilled seed of 20 virile tennage males without overflowing is the mark of a true porn star. Rating: “A+”.
Toejam overall rating: “A”.
Dang. My favorite season is on the brink of falling toward winter. Summer and the hot temperatures insure a nice lack of female clothing. Unfortunately, the cooler temperature about to descend on the area means the flesh displays will be at a minimum. That’s why I’m reserving my perch at the convenience store. Babes gotta drop the draws when they expel body waste thus revealing lots of skin.
Oh, DDP is going to pick me up this coming Monday at the airport in her newly acquired Falcon F-7. I can’t wait to zip down the coast road at 110 mph on the way to our carnal retreat. As a present I bought DPP a nice 24 carat pair of nipple clamps shaped like the claws of a grizzly bear. She is an animal lover and calls me “huggy bear” whenever we’re about to reach the peak of Mount Climax. How sweet. I figure the nip clamps will enhance our experience in getting to the plateau.
OK, off to see my nesting place for the winter. I’ll be setting up a spy-cam along side of the peep-hole so I may share some of the finer poop and pee action with ya’ll.
Ooooh Toejam~
You know how I love nipple clamps!!
Also, I’ll be bring my assistant with me when we pick you up. I think you’ll like her. Her former job title was “Playmate”!
DDP – You need to give Toejam, who bills himself as an expert on female anatomy, a class on female anatomy and explain to him the difference between the numeric measurement and the alphabetic cup size measurement of a woman. As you well know, often the numeric has very little to do with boob size. It’s all in the cup size as in today’s example. For some reason he thinks because this lady has big boobs she must be a 38 instead of a 36 (her official Playboy measurement). He should have seen my ex-wife who had huge boobs but was only a 34, as in 34D.
She’s already done that size stuff, Denny….When I gave her a lesson in “dick-size” she replied: “Oh shit Toe you gonna slip that up my sperm bank’s front door it’s gonna tickle my tonsils.
First off – The admonition to, “Click on image to enlarge” is unnecessary – They’re quite large enough on their own. As a matter of fact, with this gal around it’s “toss out the pillows honey, I won’t be needing them!”
Then – In spite of what Toejam thinks, you really don’t have to be blind and use braille to locate these tits. I’d suspect that the soft feel of and the aroma from her gigantic orbs would be enough – And then there’s always the warmth emanating off of those massive globes to attract any guy’s heat seeking missile – Blind or not.
But – In defense of Toejam – I gotta’ agree with his 38-D assessment. Unless, she’s very petite. In that case, she’ll be stoop-shouldered by the time she’s in her mid-30’s.
PS:
The boobs look real – But – The hair is fake – I’m sure the carpet won’t match the drapes.
Yabadabadoo!
Somewhere out there there’s a street missing two man hole covers. Be careful drivers.
Perfect Natural Breast.
A little late but better late than never. I see A/D has sent us another babe wearing bazunga mega-veils. Her aureoles are about the same size as the main entry hatch cover on the International space station. Oh, will this display of obscenity and disrespect for proper female anatomy ever end? Ah, I spy some very alluring features that may offset the boob baggage, however. I got a date shortly with the local convenience shop owner. He’s renting me some space above the lady’s room and I have to check it out and locate a spot to drill the “eye-spy-in-the-sky peep-hole.
1) FACE: Typical porn beauty. That hair looks like it was purchased at the local Dollar Store. After all Halloween is only 6 weeks away and the faux hair pieces are currently in abundance. Eyes and nose are her finer features. Transplant them to Justin Bieber’s mug and you’ll never tell the difference. OMFG, those bloated lips. How’d they get oversized? Plastic surgeon? Tootin on a Johnson? Munching carpets? Probably all of the above. Rating: “B-“.
2) BOOBAGE: Au Naturale as I suspect and not bad either. The down side is her aureoles and that mole canker on the side of her left boob. Maybe her boy/girlfriend is blind and uses it as sort of a braille to locate the tit. Who knows, but it is distracting to one with 20/20 vision. Rating: “B”.
3) TORSO: Ah ha. Finally we get to the creme de la creme of this damsel’s bod. Her mid-section is really nice. Slim, toned and the way it’s displayed makes me shiver in delight. This one part of the lady’s anatomy may put her in the “A” category. Perhaps it’s the juxtaposition of her 38-D boobs that enhances her tummy, but whatever the reason for such a fine display gets her a high rating. And that perfect “innie” that’s perfectly capable of holding the spilled seed of 20 virile tennage males without overflowing is the mark of a true porn star. Rating: “A+”.
Toejam overall rating: “A”.
Dang. My favorite season is on the brink of falling toward winter. Summer and the hot temperatures insure a nice lack of female clothing. Unfortunately, the cooler temperature about to descend on the area means the flesh displays will be at a minimum. That’s why I’m reserving my perch at the convenience store. Babes gotta drop the draws when they expel body waste thus revealing lots of skin.
Oh, DDP is going to pick me up this coming Monday at the airport in her newly acquired Falcon F-7. I can’t wait to zip down the coast road at 110 mph on the way to our carnal retreat. As a present I bought DPP a nice 24 carat pair of nipple clamps shaped like the claws of a grizzly bear. She is an animal lover and calls me “huggy bear” whenever we’re about to reach the peak of Mount Climax. How sweet. I figure the nip clamps will enhance our experience in getting to the plateau.
OK, off to see my nesting place for the winter. I’ll be setting up a spy-cam along side of the peep-hole so I may share some of the finer poop and pee action with ya’ll.
Actually they are 36D.
I’m sticking with 38-D
The aureoles add the extra 2 inches, Denny
Wiki and Playboy both say 36D. She was a Playboy Playmate.
Mr. Wilson, always remember: http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/445589-never-argue-with-an-idiot-they-will-only-bring-you
Is that Miz Anti-Vaxx?
Name or year and month?
Ooooh Toejam~
You know how I love nipple clamps!!
Also, I’ll be bring my assistant with me when we pick you up. I think you’ll like her. Her former job title was “Playmate”!
~XxxOoo
1 into 2 ain’t bad, DDP!
It’s been a while since we did a threesome and I’m up fot it.
Of course, my love remains your sole property, but my lust is out there for every hot honey who needs some physical satisfaction.
Line up the babes, I’m locked and loaded!
DDP – You need to give Toejam, who bills himself as an expert on female anatomy, a class on female anatomy and explain to him the difference between the numeric measurement and the alphabetic cup size measurement of a woman. As you well know, often the numeric has very little to do with boob size. It’s all in the cup size as in today’s example. For some reason he thinks because this lady has big boobs she must be a 38 instead of a 36 (her official Playboy measurement). He should have seen my ex-wife who had huge boobs but was only a 34, as in 34D.
She’s already done that size stuff, Denny….When I gave her a lesson in “dick-size” she replied: “Oh shit Toe you gonna slip that up my sperm bank’s front door it’s gonna tickle my tonsils.
Because she was laughing so hard because to find your dick you had to split hairs to find one that bled.
It says “click on photo to enlarge.” I click on it, and sure enough, I get bigger!
How do they know?
First off – The admonition to, “Click on image to enlarge” is unnecessary – They’re quite large enough on their own. As a matter of fact, with this gal around it’s “toss out the pillows honey, I won’t be needing them!”
Then – In spite of what Toejam thinks, you really don’t have to be blind and use braille to locate these tits. I’d suspect that the soft feel of and the aroma from her gigantic orbs would be enough – And then there’s always the warmth emanating off of those massive globes to attract any guy’s heat seeking missile – Blind or not.
But – In defense of Toejam – I gotta’ agree with his 38-D assessment. Unless, she’s very petite. In that case, she’ll be stoop-shouldered by the time she’s in her mid-30’s.
PS:
The boobs look real – But – The hair is fake – I’m sure the carpet won’t match the drapes.
No apology for Boehner?
They’re 36 D, and she is 41.
Next…
Actually the carpet is rather light. And as I said, the measurement is straight from Playboy so you can go ahead and dispute Playboy.
You boobs, the difference between 36 and 38 is her overall chest circumference. Her D cup size is what we care about.
Can’t even spell my own name!
36 and 38 are the circumference of her chest. Her boob size is D.
Jami Ferrel January 97, carpet is a pretty good match to the drapes or vise versa. She is a natural blonde for sure. Quite a beautiful, real woman.