Joke Of The Day

Yannow, I just can’t seem to get my dander up enough to write any good stuff lately. Impeachment is gonna fizzle making the Dimocrats look like fools. Trump is fundraising off it. The American people are disgusted with it. Maybe it will backfire so badly that the Republicans will retake the House. Speaker Blinky has a history of overreach. Remember Obummercare? This is the same bullshit.

I also hope the conservatives in Virginia will get off their asses and vote in the next election. They are seeing exactly what Dimocrats do when you give them power. They’re not only going after the Second Amendment in Virginia, but the First as well. C’mon Virginia conservatives start filing lawsuits. You need to get these anti-constitutional gun laws in front of the Supreme Court.

And that’s all I’ve got today, so here’s a joke from Gary.

A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck
fixed. They couldn’t do it while he waited, so he said he didn’t live
far and would just walk home.

On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket
and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up
a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the
store he now had a problem – how to carry his entire purchases home.

While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old
lady who told him she was lost. She asked, ‘Can you tell me how to get
to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?’

The farmer said, ‘Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to
that house I would walk you there but I can’t carry this lot.’

The old lady suggested, ‘Why don’t you put the can of paint in the
bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and
carry the goose in your other hand?’

‘Why thank you very much,’ he said and proceeded to walk the old girl
home. On the way he says ‘Let’s take my short cut and go down this
alley. We’ll be there in no time.’

The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, ‘I am a
lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that when
we get in the alley you won’t hold me up against the wall, pull up my
skirt, and have your way with me?’

The farmer said, ‘Holy smokes lady! I’m carrying a bucket, a gallon of
paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly
hold you up against the wall and do that?’

The old lady replied, ‘Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket,
put the paint on top of the bucket, and I’ll hold the chickens.

7 comments on “Joke Of The Day

  1. Hey Denny;

    Got a laugh out of the joke, LOL. Seriously I keep coming up with rants about the impeachment circus and I get home and it is *poof*. I have a huuuge gut feeling that the democrats will pay for this impeachment circus. The crap in Virginia is a warning to the 2A community and to conservatives to not take any elections for granted. It is a warning for us here in GA, Abrams Tank barely got edged out by Kemp. Their base was fired up, ours not so much in 2018. I am hoping there will be a big groundswell in 2020 and it checks the democrats. Every election now, we vote for our survival. I don’t want to open the 4 th box yet and I am hoping my son don’t have to either(he is 17).

    • Bloomberg poured a lot of money into the VA mid-terms. If you look at the election map, four counties in NOVA, the Richmond, Charlottesville and Norfolk area are the only blue areas in the state, but they are the most populated. VA should not be a blue state, it’s just plain wrong. I read somewhere a few days ago that one of the pols said we are going to make VA more progressive than California. I’ve been checking out property in Savannah, GA. Maybe this is the push I need.

  2. Heard that one before but it still evokes a smile.
    As for rants, you used to really let ’em loose, but now when you occasionally post one of your own it really stands out from what we usually see here every day.
    If you need some inspiration, I stopped by “Gut Rumbles” the other day and re-readin’ some of Pumpman’s old stuff kinda kick-started my mental processes. Maybe it’ll do the same for you?

    • I.R., I agree that Himself has mellowed, but disagree that he’s stagnant. He still has the energy for a decent kill-shot, but please consider the material he’s been given to work with. Aside from the Tummy Tuck and Shithead Circus going on in the Senate—what truly is here? Real life? THAT kinda stuff?

      Well, shucks. I just can’t imagine him writing a blog on how to screw over a homeowners’ association. Uh, wait a minute. On second thought, I could.

      I’ll take a double dip of caustic — when available. Just give the old grouch some extra time.

      • I’m always willin’ to give Mr Wilson all the time he needs, sir. Some of the stuff he just kinda tosses out there surprises me with the number of comments it generates. Add in the Designated Hitter, Ron, and we’re all gettin’ our money’s worth. AOTW and Boobage are the frosting on the cake. Monday Puns seem to’ve inspired readers to send in more and comment, including our beloved Claudia.
        I’m happy to see anything when I log in here daily.

  3. There once was a lady from Siam
    Who said to her lover, young Khayyam
    To seduce me, of course you will have to use force! But thank goodness you’re stronger than l am!

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