Ron opines.

Holy Credisrod! Haven’t been able to watch any news on TV for a coupla weeks now, what with all that hot air comin outta D.C. ‘bout a bug that MIGHT cause the deaths of one tenth as many Murkans as reg’lar seasonal flu.

I know there’s no hard evidence for it, but I kinda suspect we oughta call it Swamp Thing rather than corona virus. First of all, nobody outside the medical profession understands what the hell a virus IS, and the common cold is a friggin corona virus, facrissake. And I’m not entirely confident that it’s not a plot of some kind by the left to kneecap the Trump 2020 campaign.

As proof of how fargin ignernt people can really be, note the fact that Corona beer sales have slumped dramatically in the past 30 days. And though I do NOT watch professional sports either in person or on TV, I kinda think shutting down the entire world is not really a good long-range plan. Hell, golf tournaments would seem to be a GOOD thing for people to go to . . . fresh air, exercise, all that stuff. Maybe not baseball/football stadia or basketball arenas.

Swamp Thing. I’m not sure how many obscene words and phrases it takes to properly describe what Pelosi, Schumer, Waters, CNN, Cuomo, Murphy, Fauci, and the rest of that leftist gang are doing to this country, but I’m up to 671 and running out of new ways to say it.

And to NO ONE’s surprise, Adam Schiff now claims to have irrefutable proof that Trump colluded with the Coronans.

Well, I can offer two legitimate words for what’s goin on in the lamestream media, which are gleefully cheering the virus they’re SURE is the final nail in the DJT political coffin: Nosophobia and hypochondriasis.

Nosophobia is an unreasonable fear of getting sick from some exotic disease. It’s characterized by fits of anxiety and numbing fear which promotes irrational behavior, which in turn can be more dangerous than the feared diseases because of really silly decisions, such as hoarding, hermiting, hating, and self-medicating.

Hypochondriasis is basically a psychological (mental) disorder characterized by preoccupation with the fear of illnesses, even despite medical advice and statistical evidence to the contrary. Some books call it a neurosis. I call it ignorance-induced Chicken-Littling.

In today’s Swamp Thing hair-on-fire hysteria, elderly people (my age group) are being deliberately frightened by talking heads who feel compelled to exaggerate statistics to the point that they all think they’re gonna die from something that will in reality kill far fewer than heart disease, diabetes, emphysema, cancer, or hospital-acquired infections.

A few other words which akshully ain’t words but prolly oughta be are panicogenic, hoardomania, virusias, headuparsis, pandecitis stimulitis, ignoramia, charminophile, purelltomaniac, maskzema, and noli me tangephobia.

And those lead me to another term which kinda sums it all up: Corona Codswallop. That’s somethin you don’t hear often these days, unless you’re for some reason British. It (codswallop) basically means a load of bull, claptrap, a crock, a flapdoodle, or just plain balderdash.

Today the self-proclaimed saviors of humanity, the pundits, the doomsayers, the overnite experts on infectious diseases, have managed to accomplish what Dems have been working and wishing for since Trump took office – a stock-market crash and global economic catastrophe so that the left can retake the Oval Office and Senate.

So now all the little guys who sell beer and soft drinks and nachos and hot dogs at major sporting events are outta work. Airport staff and airline crews are on cutback. Schools are closed. Janitors, plumbers, carpenters, ticket-takers, parking lot attendants, health-care workers, all manner of ordinary people are no longer required at various venues normally packed with warm bodies for basketball, movies, high-school sports, even voting.

Many families will have to deal with children who’d normally be in school, out of danger, out of trouble, getting decent meals, learning something useful, but are now hanging around the house with nothing to do all day while single moms have to make arrangements for somebody to watch ‘em ‘til their shifts are over.

The panic created, magnified, and spread by the mainstream media will cost hundreds of thousands, probably millions, of people real cash in terms of lost wages, babysitters, and other unprogrammed expenses. And of course 9 months from now we’ll have a huge spike in births in families that can’t really afford another kid.

There is, on the other hand, the possibility of a resurgence in manufacturing stuff we need here instead of contracting it from other countries with cheaper labor costs. We might even see a shift toward a more production-oriented work force than a service economy.

A whole lotta small businesses will go belly up, and although a few new ones will spring up to exploit the situation, the ratio will be bad enough to trigger a recession, possibly a depression, and wipe out all the positive impact of the DJT administration . . . except for the judicial appointments.

Hillary, needing to stimulate some interest in her as a potential hail-Mary candidate this July in Milwaukee, offers her plan for dealing with the virus: First, you bleach it and then pound it with a hammer. If that doesn’t work, you hire a writer to create a rumor that it has damaging information on her; and it would soon be found a victim of suicide.

San Fran Nan has reminded all residents of her district to make sure to wash their hands after defecating on the city sidewalks. And a whole lotta people are about to learn the harsh reality of how most of the rest of the world deals with cleaning their rectums without using tissue paper.

Lady who runs a blog I drop comments on several times a week asked me if the virus scares me. Here’s what I told her:

Yeah, ’bout as much afraid as I am of cancer, TB, diabetes, The Red Death, stroke, heart attack, tidal wave, sudden pole shift, asteroid strike, Mau Mau uprising, a totally berserk Malay with a large kris . . . or a Commie, a Dummy, or a career felon flyin the Resolute Desk.

I’m GOC and I approve of this message. We have crippled our economy and cratered the stock market for a disease that has so far infected 9000 people and killed 150 people out of a population of 370 million people. A little spiked virus has succeeded in doing to our economy what the rat bastard commies have been trying to do.