This one is from Jon.
Bill went to work at the Oceanic Search and Rescue facility where they were training dolphins to locate shipwrecked sailors and deliver emergency provisions to them. His supervisor Stan was taking him through the orientation and describing the equipment the dolphins carried in their special harnesses. “And in the finest tradition of the Swiss St. Bernards, we equip the dolphins with a flask of brandy to tide the stricken sailor over until we can reach him.”
Stan assigned Bill the task of putting together the harnesses and left him to his work.
He returned later to find Bill taking nips from the brandy flasks.
“You can’t do that!, “ Stan exclaimed, “Those are …”
… “for medicinal porpoises only!”
Was it a bottlenose?
Where the hell is Claudia when we desperately need her?
She’s watching; she takes names …
Cheers
And there’s the story that ends “For small intense sand porpoises, they’re the same.”
Oh! my cod, please, don’t give me a haddock. You dolphinately not want me on this whale of fortune. It’s already eely bad and out of tuna. Even with the brandy, I couldn’t riesling to the challenge. You will all carp and whine of being hooked on a dullpun.
W. C. Fields would be proud.