Ron sent me this.

That’s pretty much Obungler’s modus operandi isn’t it? Like getting any deal, no matter how bad, with Iran will be considered a success by Oblunder. Cutting the deficit down to $500 billion (which is still higher than any of Bush 43’s deficits) from his trillion dollar deficits is considered a success. The Obeauzeau worshipers claim that the 2008 trillion dollar deficit belongs to Bush because the fiscal year started during Bush’s last term. That is disingenuous, since Congress passed the spending bills after Bush left office and they were signed by Jug Hussein Ears Downgrade so they belong to him and not to the reviled Chimpy McHalliburton Bushitler. I’ve read articles by Obumbler fellators who have stated that very thing and then claimed that Oboner has actually lowered the deficit throughout his presidency. Don’t they know it’s bad manners to talk with their mouths full?

It is so sad watching my country commit suicide on the altar of multiculturalism, Diversity (All Hail Diversity!), and political correctness. We had a good run starting out as colonies of England, becoming the most powerful and wealthy country in the history of this planet and then throwing it all away. We are wasting our wealth supporting moochers, looters, leeches, and parasites and we elected the first president who hates the country he is running and is doing everything in his power trying to turn this country into his version of a socialist utopia. What is sad is he has a political party who is aiding and abetting the destruction and is cheering him on. Why does the Dimocrat Party want to destroy this country? Future historians will ask that very question. They will wonder why Americans stood by and watched the destruction and did nothing. I used to think it would take another fifty years for our gummint to devolve into a socialist dictatorship. Now I think it will only take twenty more years. Fortunately, I’ll be dead and won’t see it. It’s bad enough to see the downward spiral. Reagan only momentarily stopped the downward slide. Unfortunately, there is not another Reagan on the horizon.

We’re doomed!

Karl U. sent me this one.

A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach almost every day. She wasn’t unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing; she would approach people who were sitting on the beach, glance around and then speak to them. Generally, the people would respond negatively and she would wander off. But occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money and something that she carried in her bag. The couple assumed that she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didn’t know for sure, they decided to just continue watching her.

After a couple of weeks the wife said, ‘Honey, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic devices?’ He hadn’t and said so.Then she said, ‘Tomorrow I want you to get a towel and our big radio and go lie out on the beach. Then we can find out what she’s really doing.’

Well, the plan went off without a hitch and the wife was almost hopping up and down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave.. The man then walked up the beach and met his wife at the road.

‘Well, is she selling drugs?’ she asked excitedly.

‘No, she’s not,’ he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.

‘Well, what is it then? What does she do ?’ his wife fairly shrieked.

The man grinned and said, ‘She’s a battery salesperson.’

‘Batteries?’ cried the wife.

‘Yes!’ he replied. (more…)

Metal harp.

Easy to look at and some nice boobage. All right. Here’s the real thing.

Not guitar this week. Paul turned me onto this Josh Turner dude. I posted some of his music last week. Here is on banjo.

I loves me some bluegrass music. Back when my mom was still alive, I used to drive up to St. Louis from Atlanta twice a year: on Thanksgiving and in the Spring. Driving through Kentucky I would pick up the public radio station from Murray State College and listen to a program called From the Back Porch where they would play blue grass and early country music. Made the miles go by faster.

Here’s Richard Thompson, singing his composition. Howza ’bout that? A Brit writing a song that sounds great on guitar and banjo.

This one is from Joe.

A young female uninformd voter is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun.

The next day she comes home and finds her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead.

She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

Hysterically the female uninformed voter screams at her husband “Shut up, you’re next!”

A blonde from Ray this week.

(more…)

I was thinking of giving it to this bitch who body slammed an elderly woman over a handicapped parking space.

A dispute over a handicapped parking space at a Walmart in Greenfield, Wisconsin last month sent a seventy-one year old to the hospital for emergency hip and leg surgery after she was attacked by a younger, larger, heavy-set woman who accused her of stealing a parking space, WITI-TV reported.

The February 3rd assault was captured on security camera footage that was released to the public. The video shows the attacker trying to maneuver her dark-colored car so that she can park in a handicapped spot, though it may not have been clear that the spot was her intended parking place.

…

At this point the elderly woman gets out of the SUV and walks by the passenger side of the dark car which is still parked blocking her in the handicapped space. The driver of the dark car gets out and walks around her car to confront the elderly woman.

The video shows the heavy-set woman throwing her weight in to the elderly woman knocking her off her feet and slamming her in to the pavement.

She later reportedly told police: “It’s not my fault the elderly woman bounced off my big (chest).”

That’s like I was just standing there doing nothing when her face hit my fist.

Witnesses to the attack quickly gathered to attend to the victim. The attacker did nothing to help. The passenger got out of the car but did not help the victim either. They both got back in the car and sped off. The video ends with the attacker’s car stopped in the next parking aisle for an unknown reason.

The alleged attacker, Kezia Perkins, 32 years old, was charged with a felony for aggravated battery.

Police said Perkins was driving on a suspended license and was using a handicapped placard that was not in her name and was not valid.

She was prolly mentally handicapped.

The elderly victim had recently undergone hip replacement surgery. The force of the attack ruptured the new hip forcing it to be replaced. The victim also suffered fractures to her femur. Police said she was in surgery for five hours after the attack.

Kezia Perkins. Black woman with a lethal big chest. My Canadian buddy (sarcasm) prolly thinks I’m a racist for posting this. She really doesn’t qualify since this happened a month ago.

Instead, this week’s award goes to Mitch McConnell and John Boner for unconditionally surrendering to Obungler and the Dimocrats. The Stupid Party just won a landslide election and have more seats in the House of Representatives than they’ve had in almost 100 years and what do the two congressional leaders of the Stupid Party do? They unconditionally surrendered to Obumbler and the Dimocrats and funded Obumbler’s illegal scamnesty program. Vote Republican. They’ll fix everything. We’re doomed!

I’ve got this senile old coot fom British Columbia whose family keeps him locked up in an attic and every now and then lets him out to use a computer. He likes to send me emails like the following:

Good Morning – Whose economy? A pipeline straight to TX will create a buyer’s market. Cheap Canadian oil for the USA. By the by – have you ever sat down with your MO or druggist and discuss your meds? Your foul language , spelling and grammatical errors would suggest more than a pain in the ass. Honour the Rat – they are dying in the thousands in stem cell research which, one day,may enable you to walk.

I wonder why he is against cheap oil? That spurs the American economy and the American economy drives the world economy. He must be a rat bastard commie.

Foul language? You bet! I love that shit! I love telling people to go fuck themselves. Especially dumb fucking booger eatin’ moh-rons!

Spelling and grammar? Not so much. Maybe he doesn’t like my use of “figger”, “sumpin”, “gummint”, “prolly”. or some of the other words I intentional misspell (BTW, have you ever noticed how many people misspell the word “misspell?) to reflect the American vernacular(I hope “vernacular” is not too large of a word for him). An American could take him to task for his spelling of “honour”. I’m sure he feels superior to us barbaric Americans by using the English spelling but he does live in British Columbia and that’s how they spell it there.

Grammar? He wrote “have you ever sat down with your MO or druggist and discuss your meds?” Bzzzzzt! Bad grammar! It should be either “and discussed” – need to have the two verb tenses agree with each other – or replace “and discuss” with “to discuss”. I just love it when someone accuses me of using poor grammar and uses poor grammar in the process. I guess we could use that as an example of irony or just plain stupidity.

He once tried to school me on English history but got his Henrys wrong and didn’t realize the Tudor dynasty started with Henry VII. When I corrected him he admitted his mistake and later said “he was testing me”. It took him three months to come up with that riposte. He’s also the booger eatin’ moh-ron who asked me on two separate occasions why I didn’t teach guitar to black children at a community center in Atlanta. I guess that was his way of calling me a racist. Like I would want to go to a community center in a black neighborhood in Atlanta. I value my life and my wallet. I guess I should take it as a compliment that he thinks I play well enough to teach. I don’t think black children would want to learn to play the type of music I play.

I’m all for stem cell research. Unfortunately, stem cells will never make me walk again. I’ve been injured way too long and the nerves below the scarring have all died so even if they do figger (purposely misspelled – American vernacular) out how to regenerate spinal cells the myelin sheath is all gone for the lower motor neurons so they could not regenerate. Also, since I’ve been a crip for so long, too much muscle mass is gone due to atrophy of the muscles. I’m sure what I wrote is over his head. Once again, he writes about sumpin’ (purposely misspelled – American vernacular) he knows nothing about. I can almost see him drooling all over the keyboard.

I’ve met many Canadians in my life. Most of them are like our beloved Claudia. I can honestly say that this guy is the first Canadian I don’t like and I’m sure the feeling is mutual. He got really pissed off at me when I referred to him as” my Canadian buddy”. I guess he didn’t get the sarcasm. It’s sad when you have to explain stuff like that, but as I said, he is a senile old coot with delusions of grandeur. The next time I emailed him I made it a point to identify what was satire, what words were purposely misspelled, and what parts of the email were insults. For some reason he wasn’t amused. For the record, most of this post is an insult. I’m making fun of him. I hope he understands that.

He never has posted a comment in the comments section of the blog. Maybe he can’t figger (purposely misspelled – American vernacular) out how to do that. After all, mastering email was hard enough. He prolly (purposely misspelled and internet slang for probably) doesn’t want my smartass readers to take him to the woodshed for making stupid comments and they would. Dudley1 would really enjoy it. AlphaDelta and Jeremy would have some fun as well. This guy makes it so easy. I actually look forward to his emails. They make my day. It’s nice to know that I’m touching lives in other countries.

The project is finished! Wanna see some pictures? They’re not of the best quality since I took them last night with an old digital camera by bil gave me ten years ago. No, I don’t have a smart phone with a camera. I got a camera with my flip phone but I don’t know about the quality of the pictures or how to transfer them and I’m too lazy to try to figger it out. You can click on the pictures to enlarge them. I also shrunk them down before posting them so they won’t go too much bigger than they are.

Roll under sink for the crip so I can use it in my wheelchair. Also got a medicine cabinet and some side drawers. Nice granite counter top. You can see the new mirror with a brushed nickel frame. Was originally gonna get a beveled glass mirror but the project manager dropped the ball and it would have taken another three weeks. This was the fall back plan.

Existing garden tub with new tile around it and new brush nickel faucet with a handheld spray feature. The fixture I really wanted had a telephone feature to put the spray on it but that wouldn’t work with the holes already drilled and would require a new tub. It was expensive as hell so it was just as well. The tile around the tub is the exact same tile that is on the floor.

New granite shower with the reflection of the light fixtures on the opposite wall. Got a grab bar to aid in getting out of the shower. My sister selected the light fixtures. The boxes they came in said to install them pointing up but the picture on the web had them pointing down which I think looks better. Each fixture has three bulbs in them, which would mean nine bulbs total for the three fixtures. For some reason I only bought six bulbs. Brain fart. CRS syndrome. The project manager just installed three more bulbs gratis. They’re all LED bulbs so they’ll prolly outlive me.

The other vanity with granite counter top.

I had the room painted blue and it goes real well with the granite and the tile. I inaugurated the shower this morning. I brushed my teeth and shaved at the new sink.

I had them install new grab bars for the toilet. The old grab bars were given to me by a friend and her father installed them. They weren’t all that good and her father only did a fair installation job. They lasted almost seventeen years so it wasn’t all that bad. The new grab bars are the industrial strength ones that you see in hotels. The nice thing about these is I don’t have to put my chair right up against the molding so I shouldn’t screw it up like I used to.

Still to come, a towel warmer and a small bath rug to put right outside the shower so my chair wheels get a better purchase on the floor for my shower transfers.

By the way, these guys do real good work. I had no problem with the worker bees. It was the project manager. The owner of the business is a super dude as well. Once he got involved, things happened quickly. Yes, I prolly will hire them for my bedroom project next year. One of the techs told me to request the other project manager for that project if I do hire them. This company has a real good reputation, has a good rating with the BBB and is on Angie’s List.

Stole the following from Daily Pundit.

Click on image to enlarge.

Crony capitalism? Nah. Couldn’t be. What’s more, besides being cheaper, the pipeline would be much better for the environment, since oil flowing through the pipeline wouldn’t produce as much carbon as the locomotives used to pull those oil cars. Remember the recent train derailment in West Virginia when all of the oil cars went off the tracks? Pipelines don’t derail. You environmental wackos opposing the pipeline are for damaging the economy but you are too fucking stupid to realize that. You guys are booger eatin’ moh-rons.

Speaking of booger eatin’ moh-rons, there was an article in this morning’s Atlanta Urinal and Constipation about charging owners of electric cars fees to help fund transportation in Georgia. These smug bastards don’t pay gas taxes so essentially they are using the roads in Georgia for free. They highlighted one couple who own two Nissan Leafs. They are squealing like stuck pigs about maybe having to pay $200 bucks a year per car. This is after the tax credits they receive for owning these two cars, or in their case, leasing them. The husband came out with the line that they are “saving the environment” by driving these cars. Yeah. That magic electricity they use just comes out of the wall. This dipstick doesn’t realize that the majority of the electricity produced in Georgia is from coal fired plants, so his car isn’t really saving the environment. What this booger eatin’ moh-ron also doesn’t realize is how bad the battery in his car is for the environment. It requires rare earth metals from China. Chinese rare earth metal mines are environment disasters. He and his wife are doing far more damage to the environent that they realize, but they live in a fantasy land where electricity is produced fron unicorn farts and rare earth metals ljust lie on the ground and can easily be picked up. You just know that these two dunderheads voted for Jug Hussein Ears Downgrade.