Got this one from Randy.

An uninformed voter was applying for a job as a prison guard. The warden said, “Now these are real tough guys in here. Do you think you can handle it?”

“No problem,” the uninformed voter replied. “If they don’t behave, out they go!”

I wonder, is Obungler still doing the choom? Or maybe he’s just delusional. Does he really believe the shit he says? He said earlier this week that he has improved America’s standing in the world and we are much better liked and respected under his presidency. WTF? Our allies no longer trust us and our enemies are laughing at us. Iran is gonna get a nuke. Islamic terrorism is on the rise. The “junior varsity” ISIS keeps gobbling up portions of Iraq. The world is a more dangerous place than it was when he took office.

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Racial relations are the worst that I have seen since the 60’s.

Didja hear what he told Axelrod? He told him that he is the closest thing to a Jew that has ever been president. Yep. That’s right. He thinks he’s the first Jewish president. That’s kinda strange when you consider how much he hates Jews. Ask Netanyahu what he thinks about Obumbler being the first Jewish president. He’s much closer to being the first Mooslime president than the first Jewish president.

Once again this dipstick gets the coveted AOTW Award.

Roman sent me this.

Now let me see if I have this right.
There’s no guidance or discipline in the home.
The family situation is so unstable, ‘Junior’
doesn’t even know where or to whom to send a Father’s
Day card. Junior gets dumped into the education system where
he is socially promoted because the overwhelmed school district
can’t deal with the undisciplined whelp.
Junior’s major formative influences are ‘gangsta’ rap
videos and a corresponding peer group of gangsta wannabes.
At age 18, Junior is turned loose on society carrying a bad
attitude, a broken compass and little respect for authority.
Junior gets himself in big trouble with the law and meets dire
consequences. Then, the situation diagnosis is that the police need
more training and understanding? Pardon me for asking, but do you
really believe this bullshit?

Liberals do. Or it’s all due to White Privilege. That’s the newest scapegoat. We can’t discipline Junior in the school due to White Privilege. We can’t kick him out of school because of White Privilege.

Hey! Howza ’bout that TSA? After taking off your shoes and belt and getting groped not to mention body scanning machines and all this after standing in long lines and dealing with surly entitled gummint workers it turns out it’s a waste of time. Speaking of surly TSA employees, Hartsfield-Corrupt Mayor Airport certainly has its share.

An internal investigation of the Transportation Security Administration revealed security failures at dozens of the nation’s busiest airports, where undercover investigators were able to smuggle mock explosives or banned weapons through checkpoints in 95 percent of trials, ABC News has learned.

Ain’t that just dandy?

The series of tests were conducted by Homeland Security Red Teams who pose as passengers, setting out to beat the system.

According to officials briefed on the results of a recent Homeland Security Inspector General’s report, TSA agents failed 67 out of 70 tests, with Red Team members repeatedly able to get potential weapons through checkpoints.

But I’m sure that here in Atlanta, the TSA workers have a pretty good success rate at stealing stuff.

In one test an undercover agent was stopped after setting off an alarm at a magnetometer, but TSA screeners failed to detect a fake explosive device that was taped to his back during a follow-on pat down.

Officials would not divulge the exact time period of the testing other than to say it concluded recently.

Kabuki theater all the way down.

Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson was apparently so frustrated by the findings he sought a detailed briefing on them last week at TSA headquarters in Arlington, Virginia, according to sources. U.S. officials insisted changes have already been made at airports to address vulnerabilities identified by the latest tests.

“Upon learning the initial findings of the Office of Inspector General’s report, Secretary Johnson immediately directed TSA to implement a series of actions, several of which are now in place, to address the issues raised in the report,” the DHS said in a written statement to ABC News.

In other words, TSA workers are gonna get even ruder and make your flying experience worse that it actually is. Ya gotta blame someone so TSA management will blame the passengers and the workers will cooperate by being ruder than they actually are, if that’s possible.

Homeland security officials insist that security at the nation’s airports is strong – that there are layers of security including bomb sniffing dogs and other technologies seen and unseen. But the officials that ABC News spoke to admit these were disappointing results.

This is not the first time the TSA has had trouble spotting Red Team agents. A similar episode played out in 2013, when an undercover investigator with a fake bomb hidden on his body passed through a metal detector, went through a pat-down at New Jersey’s Newark Liberty Airport, and was never caught.

At the time, the TSA said Red Team tests occurred weekly all over the United States and were meant to “push the boundaries of our people, processes, and technology.”

“We know that the adversary innovates and we have to push ourselves to capacity in order to remain one step ahead,” a TSA official wrote on the agency’s blog in March 2013. “[O]ur testers often make these covert tests as difficult as possible.”

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! As difficult as possible? GMAFB! The whole purpose of the TSA is to make us think that the gummint can actually protect us.

“We gotta protect our phony baloney jobs gentlemen” – Governor William J. Lepotoman

The TSA. Just another gummint jobs program.

Meanwhile, while we have to submit to this farce, our southern border is wide open and neither political party seems to want to take care of that problem.

Heironymus sent me a link to a spelling test. For the record I got an A+.

You’re a spelling genius! You’re an intelligent and careful speller with an eye for detail. You clearly know all of the most commonly misspelled words in English like the back of your hand. Use your spelling knowledge to save the world, because without you we won’t survive!

When I went to school, students were drilled in spelling with many, many spelling tests. We also learned the differences between to, too, and two. And there, their, and they’re. I before e, except after c, unless the word rhymes with way like weigh. Of course, there are many exceptions like weird. Woe betide me if I turned in an essay in high school with misspelled words. This was long before spellcheck. Because of this drilling and rote, misspelled words jump off the page at me. Alas, we no longer teach this stuff to our children. Even cursive is dying out. Remember Trayvon Martin’s girlfriend who was nineteen and in eleventh grade and didn’t know how to read cursive? I’ll venture to say that she didn’t know how to spell either.

I don’t think I have ever seen a single misspelled word on any essay Ron has ever sent me. He’s a few years older so he went through the same rigorous English language training I did. Same with my sister who is four years older. Even my senile old Canadian buddy who likes to take exception to my writing and politics never misspells a word except for those ending in or like color since he uses the British version colour. Those drills may have been tedious and boring but you would be surprised how much more intelligent one’s writing looks without misspelled words.

One more thing. Have you ever noticed that the finalists in the spelling bees seem to be dot not feather Indians?

An overcast start to a hot muggy day,
And I realize that I have nothing to day,
So I’ll dig around into that matter that’s gray
And come up with some damned thing any old way.

I wish that the media saw their way clear
To tell me what happened, not what I SHOULD hear.
I want to know who did what, to whom, and where
But that’s not what normally gets on the air.

Instead they explain only what THEY think’s news
And ignore any issue that won’t match their views.
They edit and cut and revise as they choose
Until what we get only serves to confuse.

Like what our dear FLotUS on commencement night
Said to throw gasoline on our racial firefight
Just because she cannot quite get over her spite
And forgive her black parents for not being white.

Yes, I want to hear who, what, when, where, how, and why
But I’ll bet Mooch’s comments don’t cause hue and cry
‘Cause the alphabet editors all will deny
That she is as racist as that Sharpton guy.

And before I go get me my sweet bun and tea
Let me give you some helpful advice that is free:
When you get a new puppy to hold on your knee,
Please consult the directions before assembly.

Saw this in this morning’s Atlanta Urinal and Constipation.

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Doesn’t that just nail it with the Clintons? Ron sent me this Jonah Goldberg quote.

“The simple fact is: This is her. There is no other her… They are Clintons and they are eternal, Aesopian, unchanging. The tackiness and the lying, the parsing and corner-cutting, the entitlement and fakery: This is what they do…They do this to themselves. They create these problems. They are the authors of their own torment because this is who they are.” – Jonah Goldberg

In a sane world, both of these grifters would be in jail for the rest of their lives. Instead, there’s a good chance the Stupid Party will nominate someone so inept that Thunder Rodent Thighs will be our next president.

Another booger eatin’ moh-ron.

As surely as the hot, dry Santa Ana winds bring blue skies to the coast and wildfires to the hills, severe California droughts bring calls to build desalination plants up and down the seashore.

Sounds like a good idea to me.

All that ocean water, begging to be converted to fresh and pumped into our pipelines, would solve our water supply problems instantly and permanently, boosters say. In the coming months, the drumbeat will only get louder. That’s not only because the current drought is the longest and most severe in memory, but because a $1-billion desalination project scheduled to start operating in Carlsbad this fall will be attracting lots of attention. The plant, the largest of its kind in the U.S., is designed to provide San Diego County with about 50 million desalinated gallons a day, about 7% of its water needs.

It’s a good start.

“A lot of people are watching what’s going to happen in Carlsbad,” says Peter MacLaggan, the executive overseeing the project for its developer, privately held Poseidon Water. “They’re going to base their future decisions on the success of this project.”

That could be a mistake. MacLaggan himself doesn’t expect desalination to be “a major component in our lifetime” of the state’s overall water supply, although Poseidon has proposed to build a second desalination plant, in Huntington Beach. That plant is still awaiting approval from the California Coastal Commission.

So what’s wrong with desalinization plants? They work in Saudi Arabia. There’s this desert there. Why not California?

Enthusiasm for desalination tends to overlook its high costs, which stem in part from its enormous energy demand and weighty environmental footprint. The modern process, known as reverse osmosis, involves forcing seawater at high pressure through a membrane that screens out the salt, leaving behind a heavily brackish residue.

In Southern California, which has become more dependent on fossil-fueled electric generation since the shutdown of the San Onofre nuclear power plant, Carlsbad

Why did they shut it down? Did it reach the end of it’s operational life or was it the anti-nuke whackos?

arguably will be moderating the effects of climate change on the region while also contributing to the greenhouse gas emissions that help cause it. (MacLaggan says Poseidon will buy carbon credits and restore local wetlands to offset the plant’s environmental impact.)

Buy carbon credits? JHFC! More global warming climate change BS. Every where you turn you see idiocy abound and since this is Californai, the land of fruits and nuts, there’s even more idiocy than usual.

“There are definite advantages to seawater desalination,” says Heather Cooley, water program director at the Oakland-based environmental think tank Pacific Institute. “It’s a reliable supply, independent of weather conditions like drought. But it’s still among the most expensive water supply options.”

So, do you want water or not? There’s the ocean. Take the salt out of it. Of course, if you didn’t have environmental whackos destroying dams and providing fresh water to support bait fish up in the Bay area you would have more water. Here’s what I have to say about these endangered species. If they can only survive in one small area of the planet they deserve to be extinct. They are at an evolutionary dead end. Do you booger eatin’ moh-rons know how many species have gone extinct in the history of this planet? More than exist now and they weren’t killed off by man. They reached an evolutionary dead end like the smelt in the Sacramento River Delta. Quit wasting fresh water trying to save them. Of course another thing you could do is cut the population by shipping all of the illegal immigrants back to where they came from. That would save a shitload of water right there.

Let’s take a look at the hard realities. As big industrial facilities, desalination plants can’t be plunked down just anywhere on the coast without destroying the qualities that attract people to the shoreline. Yet the plants need to be close to customers, with room for pumps, pipelines, inflows and outfalls.

Poseidon rejected three locations before settling on the Carlsbad site, which is next to NRG Energy’s Encina Power Station. That allowed the new plant to share the seawater-cooled power station’s water lines, which reduced its cost and its impact on marine life. Even so, according to a 2012 state appeals court ruling, the plant had to install extra equipment to reduce its marine impact in periods when Encina isn’t running; if the power plant shuts down permanently, the desalination plant may have to submit a new environmental impact report.

OMFG! More environmental stupidity! Yannow what? You fucktards deserve to die of thirst. I hope the drought goes on another ten years.

I can’t read anymore of this drivel. The majority of California’s water problems are caused by envirotards and liberals progressives rat bastard commies. Build dams. Create more reservoirs instead of eliminating them. You don’t like fossil fuel power? Build nuke plants. Quit wasting fresh water to save a bait fish. Cut your population by deporting all of the illegals. Build desalinization plants. Bam! Problem solved. Need money to do this? Don’t waste money building a bullet train from nowhere to nowhere.

My friend Pres sent me this. What we’re living in now.

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Look. We elected an unqualified man due to the color of his skin and his ability to read words, written by others, off a screen. Over the last six years the number of people on welfare and food stamps have soared to record levels. While the gummint tells us that the unemployment rate is dropping, what they don’t tell us is that one of the reasons this is happening is they don’t count the people who have given up looking for a job. The job participation rate for the US is at an all time low. Meanwhile, the gummint is also telling us that what is more important than national defense is fighting non-existent global warming. Our enemies no longer fear us. They’re laughing at the weakling in the White House. The only people he wants to fight are Republicans and the Stupid Party lays down and takes it. Our allies don’t trust us. Obungler has accomplished the feat of making Jimmah Carter look like a good president in comparison.

Here is a delicious irony. The people who are doing the worst under Obumbler are blacks. Their unemployment levels are at record highs as well. They did far better under Reagan and both Bushes than they have under Obeauzeau. But then, the Dimocrat Party only cares about blacks for their votes and the useful idiots in the Congressional Black Caucus don’t care for their constituents. They live like kings and queens on their bloated congressional salaries while their constituents continue to dwell in poverty and go to substandard schools even though huge amounts of money are spent on said schools. Due to teachers unions, most of the money goes to large salaries for teachers and administrators. I know Atlanta spends over $12k per student in their rotten schools. IIRC DC shovels about $15K per student for their failing schools.

Now there is a chance we may see another election with a Bush versus a Clinton. C’mon, in a country with over 300 million people this is the best we can do? A crooked, corrupt, fake feminist shrieking harridan against another member of an aristocratic New England family?

We should live in a meritocracy. There was a time we did. That time has passed just like the glory days of this once great country. Now we truly do live in an ineptocracy. But we did elect the first black president. Ain’t that cool?

Another one from the twisted mind of Stephan Pastis.

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