AOTW 2-12-2021

This week I’m giving it to Mark Cuban who own some basketball team in Texas. He decided that he was gonna stop playing the National Anthem at the games, prolly so his players didn’t have to kneel or sumpin’. The NBA should prolly play the Chinese national anthem anyway. Funny, but the NBA told Cuban he would have to play the anthem. Anyway, Cuban’s an asshole and he has an appropriate name.

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Gorilla My Dreams

So Herb suggested I make this person as my AOTW. She would make a better booger eatin’ moh-ron of the week.

She’s thinking about stickin’ it to the glue manufacturer.

Tessica Brown, the Louisiana woman who styled her hair with Gorilla Glue and later sought medical treatment for her hardened head of hair, may soon file a lawsuit against the makers of the product, according to a new report.

Brown had originally shared her story last week, in a TikTok video viewed nearly 21 million times as of Tuesday morning. In it, she admitted to using Gorilla Glue spray adhesive on her head, after running out of her preferred brand of hairspray.

Using glue on your hair? That is a really high level of stupidity there.

Brown alleged that she hadn’t been able to remove the glue since spraying it on her ‘do “about a month” before, and ultimately took herself to the emergency room over the weekend, where they apparently instructed her to use sterilized water and nail polish remover pads to remove the adhesive, according to a photo Brown shared on Instagram. Then, on Sunday, Brown shared a YouTube video of another woman helping to apply the pads to her scalp, while Brown wiped away tears and, at one point, winced in pain.

Now, sources for TMZ claim that Brown has hired a lawyer to look into a case against Gorilla Glue, seeing as the product itself warns against use on the skin and eyes, but not hair. TMZ’s sources further claim that Brown had even tried softening the glue with rubbing alcohol, at the suggestion of the folks at Gorilla Glue.

Looks like Gorilla Glue is now gonna have to add hair to that warning but no one at that company would have really anticipated anyone dumb enough to use it on hair. Warning: Never overestimate the intelligence of a consumer.

I can just see members of the jury on that trial trying not to laugh at Ms. Brown’s stupidity, unless, of course, her lawyers managed to get a jury as dumb as she is.

Good news! She’s unstuck!

Ronsday – Twilight of America

Ron rants.

Weird . . . what goes on in D.C. Best economy in history . . . lowest unemployment EVER . . . border trespasses W-A-Y down . . . energy independent . . . and just about everybody better off than they were during the Golden Negro’s tenure.

But . . . toxic fumes leaking out from the Potomac marshes contaminated the atmosphere and gave everybody a bad case of TDS, introducing a Fool’s Gold Age of Ignorance created by nation-killer Soros and the disinformation arm of the DNC which caused the GOP to become congressipated and paranoid.

A giant plume formed over the entire region – call it the Beltway Bubble. Actually the noxious gas had been bubbling up from Ol’ Swampy for decades, but recently – prob’ly due to ‘anthropogenic climate change’ – its potency has increased exponentially because of relentless propaganda from the left-wing “news” sources.

Libs and conservatives in central government adopted the practice of automatically voting opposite each other on nearly all issues. Any rule or regulation or law proposed by a Conservative got an auto knee-jerk “NO!” from the left, and anything sponsored by the left got the same reaction from conservatives.

Good examples would be CNN and FoxNews: Trumpistos discredited and suggested dismantling CNN while Leftistes wanted to shut down FoxNews completely. Reality is, though, that nearly no one on the left ever watches Fox, and very few conservatives pay serious attention to CNN, so essentially they’re just like the “Hands-Up/Don’t-Shoot” bots, barking at phantoms and howling at the moon without a clue as to what actually happened.

Each side complains about biased or outright fake news by the other side but never actually LISTENS to what’s being reported, or how it’s presented, or why it’s not even mentioned on the opposition networks.

It’s kinda like gun control – snowflakes love to chant “Hey, Hey, NRA – how many kids did you kill today?” when the truth is that the answer is NONE, but they won’t believe it. Hey, if the millions of people who legally own millions of guns in this country were actually a bunch of mass murderers, I’m sure we’d know it by now. There wouldn’t BE any friggin liberals runnin around bitchin about everything.

Hey, I’d like to be able to see their point of view on guns, abortions, Trump, illegal immigration, Islam, climate change, and a buncha other things, but I just can’t get my head that far up my ass.

And radicalism – wholly shi’ite, amigos mios . . . all summer long Antifa and BLM destroyed businesses, buildings, police cars, public property, and people’s lives, but the mainstream media insisted that it was all “mostly peaceful” and the violence was “just a myth” ‘cause all the world’s problems were caused by old white men.

Then a few agent-provocateur assholes managed to get into the Capitol and Congressional offices (with the help of the Capitol police) and suddenly it’s an insurrection planned and staged by the evil Orangeman (who actually asked the demonstrators to behave and then to go home when they became troublesome).

JayZeus, mouseketeers, talk about hypocrisy – the Dems say we need to “heal” the racial divide in this country, but then their potus dementius candidate actually declares publicly that his veep partner WILL BE a female of color. Hey, Hey, MLK – did you hear what he said today?

And the posterboy for old white troublemakin dudes — Joey B — panders to political grievance groups such as BLM and LGBTQ and sucks up to the climate hysteria autists and Sinophiles. Good Fargin Grief, folks . . . doncha think it’s time we establish a policy of political pre-nups to do something about all the lies and hypocrisy and empty promises??? If they don’t produce once they get into office, take away their bennies and fire their lyin asses the same way you would a cheatin spouse.

JRB is NOT the legitimately elected PotUS any more than RocketMan is the legitimately elected supreme leader of NorKor. Goddamit, Joey B thinks he’s pushin all the right buttons for his base, but the one that NEEDs to be pushed is the MUTE button.

Everybody, and that’s EVERYbody, including DOCTOR Jill, knows that Joe has lost hearing in his starboard eye and the cheddar slipped off his Ritz a LONG time ago.

The faux potus, the guy who said you can’t rule by EO alone but has signed dozens of the goddam things in his first two weeks in office, is a pathetic, fumbling, bumbling, stumbling old fool who can’t finish a sentence without getting his tongue wrapped around his eye teeth so that he can’t see what the hell he’s saying, even when what he’s supposed to say is written down for him on a card or a teleprompter.

CinC Doofus, his resurrected lack-of-visionaries, AND his “election” belong in the Guiness Book of Idiocies. We are deep into the sad twilight of a once-proud republic now circling the bowl. In other words, “Toto, I have a feeling we’re not in America anymore.”

Joke Of The Week

From Gary.

WHAT CAUSES ARTHRITIS?

A man smelling of booze and cigarettes sat down on a subway next to a
priest. His tie was stained, there was red lipstick on his collar and
face and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat
pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, “Tell me
Father, do you happen to know what causes arthritis?”

The priest replies, “My son, it’s caused by loose living, consorting
with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow
man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.”

The drunk muttered in response, “Well, I’ll be damned”, then returned
to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and
apologized. “I’m very sorry. I didn’t mean to come on so strong. How
long have you had arthritis?”

The man answered, “I don’t have it, Father. I was just reading here
that the Pope suffers from it.”

MORAL: Make sure you understand the question before offering the answer

Jeep Ad

I heard there was a football game on last night. I didn’t watch it. In fact, I haven’t watched one minute of the Anti-American Negro Felons League this season. I don’t want to waste my time watching a bunch of black thugs who have made saints out of lowlifes like George Floyd and who disrespect our flag and the country that has made them rich. Fuck ’em!

One of my readers sent me an ad for Jeeps that ran during the game. I could only watch about 30 seconds of it before I wanted to throw up. It was all about coming together. To top it off, it was narrated by Bruce Springsteen, because no one knows more about coming together and “meeting in the middle” like liberal asshole Bruce Springsteen.

“Meeting in the middle” for the left means giving them everything they want and going full bore rat bastard commie.

“Meeting in the middle” means giving up our guns.

“Meeting in the middle” is censoring voices on the right.

“Meeting in the middle” is accepting the results of a stolen election.

“Meeting in the middle” is throwing open our borders and welcoming the entire Third World into this country. Then giving them the right to vote so we get more Idiot Omars, Rancida Tlaibs, and AOC Smollets.

Springsteen said that if Trump won in 2020, he would move to Australia. Right. Just like all the celebrities who said they would leave the country if Trump won in 2016. The trouble is they always break their promises. Streisand never left. Cher never left. Rosie never left. And Brucie wouldn’t have left either.

I love what the Babylon Bee posted before the Super Bowl.

U.S.—All around the country, conservatives have invited friends and family over to enjoy food, funny commercials, football, and being insulted by every major corporation in America.

“I love football,” said local Christian conservative Brad Longaberger, “but I also love the humbling experience of sitting through hours of sermons from powerful corporations reminding me how rotten and terrible I am for not supporting progressive causes!”

Jeep did its part.

Sunday Metal 2-7-2021

Orwell was a little bit off on his date with 1984. It looks like it will turn out to be 2024. Don’t expect the 2024 election to be any less crooked than 2020. Anyhoo, here’s Spirit with 1984. It seems rather appropriate with the times we’re currently living in.

One of the members of Spirit, Jay Ferguson, left to form Jo Jo Gunne. He now does soundtracks, most notably the soundtrack of NCIS Los Angeles.