Joke Of The Week

From my friend Phil.

A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

The father offered his son the following deal.

“You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut. Then we’ll talk about the car.”

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he’d settle for the offer and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, “Son, you’ve brought your grades up and I’ve observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I ’m disappointed you haven’t had your hair cut.”

The boy said, “You know, Dad, I’ve been thinking about that, and I’ve noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair, and there’s even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair.”

Got to love the Dad’s reply:

“Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?”

Way To Go Eric

Eric Clapton has had enough!

I wonder how long it will be before YouTube takes down this video.

Earlier this summer, Clapton said that he would not perform at any concert venues requiring proof of vaccination for attendees.

AOTW 8-27-2021

Before we move on to the presentation of the award a side note. Meghan McRINO is a little peeved that Horizontal Harris placed a wreath in Viet Nam to commemorate the memory of her father.

Meghan McCain shaded Vice President Kamala Harris on Wednesday, hours after Harris paid her respects at a Hanoi, Vietnam, memorial to McCain’s father, the late U.S. Sen. John McCain, three years after the senator’s death.

“If you want to honor my dads legacy on this anniversary of his death – you would spend every second making sure every single American and Afghan ally is out of harms way,” McCain tweeted without ever mentioning Harris’ name. “He was nothing if not someone who understood sacrifice and loyalty to the people he served with.”

Just remember Meghan, that you voted for her and your mother works for her boss.

So the dude who shot Ashli Babbitt has come clean and claims he is a hero. He claims he save countless lives. Now let’s pretend that he was white and Ashli Babbitt was black. There would be rioting in the streets. Mad Maxipad Watrers would be screaming for his scalp.

I’m giving the award to President * this week. He has doubled down on his incompetence. Every time he opens his mouth he digs the hole he is in even deeper. No servicemen had died in Afghanistan for eighteen months. This week twelve Marines and a Navy Corpsman died from a suicide bomber.

I hope all of you Biden voters are happy that you voted for this incompetent fraud.

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Clusterfark

“Never underestimate Joe’s ability to fuck things up.” – Obungler

“Joe has been wrong about every foreign policy decision for the last forty years.” – Robert Gates. But you voted for him anyway didn’t you you stupid asshole?

We’re seeing a repeat of Saigon with helicopters evacuating the embassy and what does the administration do? It sends Horizontal Harris to Viet fucking Nam! Unbelievable.

Yannow, it ain’t President * making these decisions. It’s his handlers. I don’t think * even knows what day it is.

A third grade pissant could do a better job of the evacuation than the people in charge.

If only we had a secure air base we could use to evacuate American citizens. Oh wait! We had one. Bagram. Unfortunately, we abandoned it in the dead of night. Whose decision was that? He should be castrated and then drawn and quartered.

We should have started evacuating Americans over two months ago. All of the civilians should have been moved out of the country before we abandoned Bagram. Then, we should have destroyed all of the equipment there and only then should we have abandoned the base.

That must have been in the copy of Sun Tzu that Milley read.

The Russians, Chinese, and the Iranians are laughing their asses off.

Every day I think we have plumbed the depths of the * administration and every day it gets worse. We just had thirteen Marines killed by a suicide bomber at the Kabul Airport. Who would have expected that to happen?

At least there are no more mean tweets from Orange Man.

Ronsday – “Leadership”

Ron goes off.

Wokeism. Critical Race Theory. Climate Change. WuHuFlu. Vaccination passports. “Return to normal.”

Jay Zeus Crepes, guys. We’re being suffocated, starved, deprived of oxygen and sustenance through guilt, fear, and pure propaganda by the hubris, intellectual ignorance, and woke offal-speak of ivy-league eggheads.

Politics and lounge-lizard philosophy are sucking all the oxygen from the place while substituting artificial sweetener for brain food by lawyers, professors, armchair generals, and past-their-shelf-life politicians who do nothing but wring their hands, wag their tongues, point their fingers, and harrumph a lot.

I picked on Nixon, I picked on Clinton, I picked on Dubya, I picked on the halfrican, and I picked on Trump. And there’s the problem. We shouldn’t HAVE TO criticize our presidents . . . we oughta be proud of ‘em and supporting what they do for us.

But they just make it so damned easy to lambast, to condemn, to ridicule them for their hypocrisy, their hubris, their ignorance . . . especially Joe & Ho. Hell, even the Brits and Aussies say Joey is demented and Kamalho is totally out of the loop.

I can only imagine how Japan, or Korea, or the Philippines, or any country with whom we have mutual defense agreements are looking at us right now.

And how ironic that now while Saigon.2 is in progress in Kabul, Sleepy Joe is sending Horizontal Harris . . . to — VIET NAM !!! What the hell is she gonna do, a Jane Fonda dog-and-pony show?

Holy Shi-ite ! I’m sure the women and girls in Afghanistan are comforted by the “no uncertain terms” of the UN Security Council’s “very strongly worded press statement” and that they will be treated with respect and dignity in true, modern, 21st century humanitarian form by their new oppressors.

Hey, jerkoffs, “calling on the Taliban” to do the right humanitarian thing is a lot like telling a gator to get away from Fluffy or a just-out-of-hibernation bear to get out of your vegetable garden.

Of course such a tactic would work if the statement were addressed to the Pentagon, or the BOR of Harvard, or the Provost of Columbia, but not to a bunch of brainwashed Neolithic ragheads carrying whips, clubs, and automatic rifles.

Betcha if you asked the Chairman of the JCS exactly how many US citizens are still in Afghanistan and when they’ll all be evacuated, he’d choke on his tongue and say he’ll have to “circle back on it,” but if you ask him how many US military officers are gay or tranny, he’ll know immediately. And he’ll explain to you why Critical Race Theory is essential to training our officer corps and how climate change is our #1 enemy.

Philosophy courses offer lots of ways to look at our “leadership” and its management of our economy, our health care, our national security, our environment, our future. The steps are kinda like this:

1. Believe the “science” even if it comes from twerps, fakes, and scammers
2. Do the “moral” and “ethical” thing when the cameras are on
3. Pretend what you’re doing is “for the American people”
4. Throw unaccountable piles of money that you don’t have at problems YOU created
5. Do it all the wrong way at the wrong time in the most expensive manner
6. Hide when even CNN criticizes you and you’re a DEMOCRAT
7. Search for the people who gave you bad advice
8. Punish innocent people who said offensive pronouns ‘n’ stuff
9. Reward loyal sycophants and pretentious bastards
10. Blame Reagan, Bush, and Trump

Repeat steps 1 → 10 until the election, or the apocalypse, whichever occurs first.

Joke Of The Week

This week it’s an Italian Mother joke.

Giuseppe excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married.

He says, “Just for fun, Mama, I’m going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.” The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house, sits them down on
the couch and they chat for a while.

He then says, “Okay, Mama, guess which one am I going to marry?”

Mama says immediately, “The one on the right.”

“That’s amazing, Mama. You’re right. How did you know?”

Mama replies: “I don’t like her.”

That would work with a Jewish mother as well.