Et Tu IBM?

No jabs, no jobs.

International Business Machines Corp. and American Airlines have put their unvaccinated employees on alert, with IBM threatening that workers who aren’t fully vaccinated by Dec. 8 will be placed on unpaid suspension and American warning that those who don’t have their COVID-19 jabs by Nov. 24 will face the ax.

Well, that’s one way to downsize. That will really help those employment numbers won’t they?

IBM has really gone downhill since I retired. Of course, it was headed that way a long time ago due to bad CEOs like John Akers. How well I remember the quality program called Market Driven Quality made up of six sigma, the Five Ups (Fuck Up, Throw up, Give up, and two others.)

We all had to attend a class called Transformational Leadership where we were taught that we needed to react to changing markets. Those were two wasted days I’ll never get back. Here’s a clue. If you walk into a classroom and the chairs and tables are arranged in a horseshoe and there are two Ken and Barbie “facilitators”, you are in for a long two days.

I wrote about this back when I still worked for IBM. Back then, I called it TCIDNN (The Company I Dare Not Name). Also back then when I would go to a blogmeet a lot of people thought I worked for their company because this bullshit was nationwide. Only two people guessed I worked for IBM. One, because her father worked there, and the other because he worked there and looked me up in our employee directory.

But I digress.

This class consisted of lectures, videos (the ubiquitous Paradigm video which I must have seen five times), and exercises. I could only participate in two of the exercises. The rest were beyond me because I was a cripple.

At this time I was an IBM instructor. I knew how to write classes and this one was an abomination. It was trying to teach change and flexibility but was very structured. It was a waste of my time because I couldn’t participate in the exercises.

After the class I tried to explain to Barbie how bad the class was. It wanted to teach us how to react to a changing market. I asked her what she and Ken would have done if they had walked and found everyone was in a wheelchair. “Your market has changed Barbie. React to it.”

All I got was a deer in the headlight look.

Another fad IBM bought into during the Aker years was breaking up the company into a bunch of little competing companies. Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert, called this Battling Business Units. This was when IBM Education became sumpin’ called Skill Dynamics. Besides selling our products and services to customers, we sold them to each other. When Lew Gerstner took over IBM he put an end to this bullshit. He said, “We can’t make money selling stuff to each other.”

Gerstner did a pretty good job but he did buy into Diversity (All Hail Diversity!). This was when Affirmative Action and Equal Opportunity were rebranded as Diversity (All Hail Diversity!). We had two Town Hall meetings on Diversity (All Hail Diversity!) I showed up for coffee and donuts at the second one, allowed my manager to see me, and ducked out and went to work. I’m sure it was a rerun of the first. I also had to attend a one day Diversity (All Hail Diversity!) Awareness Workshop. Another wasted day. This time Ken was queer and Barbie was a New York Jewish bull dyke.

Gerstner created IBM’s first VP in charge of Diversity (All Hail Diversity!). Of course he was an African.

IBM started having people work from home long before the Kung Flu. Office space is expensive. Had I taken up on my CDSM©’s offer to come back to work as a contractor, I would have worked from home. Most of my coworkers are now working work from home. Two of them moved up to the North Georgia mountains. Why live in the Atlanta metro area if you don’t have to?

So, are all of those people who work from home gonna have to get the jab? Why? This is total bullshit but that is what has happened to IBM.

I would like to see a bunch of IBM’ers file a lawsuit. The same with American Airlines employees.

Didja see what happed with Southwest Airlines over the weekend? A massive sickout which caused 2000 flight cancellations.

Maybe if this spread we would see an end to this bullshit.

20 comments on “Et Tu IBM?

  1. Never in my 30-plus-year career was a Six Stigma person alongside of me in an elevator machine room fixing a customer problem.

  2. “Computers get viruses. Therefore COVID can travel through the network and infect others.” Thus sayeth the idiots in charge.

  3. Why is this surprising? Didn’t IBM cooperate and expand their business in Germany after the National Socialists took over (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IBM_and_the_Holocaust)?

    The only website that I could find that seemed to deny the IBM-National Socialist connection appears intent on defending that National Socialists more than IBM’s connection to them (https://nationalvanguard.org/2021/06/jewish-assertions-no-substance-ibm-and-the-holocaust/)

  4. I do remember the MDQ crap. This had to be part of everyones self assessment for multiple years. Just before that was “empowerment”. This was dropped rather quickly.

  5. Man can I relate to this. I guess we worked there at the same time, but in different divisions. I remember the first diversity guy (Ted something, but same guy you reference) who killed a commercial that had black people eating lasagna (he was black). He said that blacks didn’t eat lasagna and wanted apple pie or fried chicken (this is not a joke).

    When I had to go to Armonk for diversity immersion during new manager training, Ted said he had diversity groups for everyone except whites. He then said he’d think about one for white boys after cracking that only his mom could call him boy. I thought how racist and duplicitous this was at the time.

    I hate woke companies and those that sign up for the jab nonsense. I’m glad I left and on my terms, not theirs. I don’t wish bad on them, only whatever they deserve. I feel sorry for those who have to suffer through this crap.

    • Yep. From 1985 to my retirement in 2004 I was in education and worked in the same building. Only the names changed. I started off teaching mainframes, 3081 and 3090, and wound up a systems programmer. Some of the names were NSD Education, IBM Education, Skill dynamics, and Education Services.

  6. Yes, IBM is demanding ALL employees be vaccinated by Dec 8, or face suspension. Remote or not. “Trust the science”

    FYI (From the horses mouth):

    U.S. IBMers,

    It has now been more than 18 months since the onset of COVID-19. While the pandemic continues to evolve around the world, the health and safety of our employees, clients and partners remains our top priority.

    President Biden recently issued an executive order mandating COVID-19 vaccines for federal contractors. As a federal contractor, it is a business imperative for IBM to comply with this mandate. In light of this requirement, the policies of many of our clients and partners, and the easy access to vaccines around the country, we will now require all IBM U.S. employees to be fully vaccinated by December 8, 2021, in order to work at IBM.

    This policy applies to all U.S. IBMers, regardless of where you work (at an IBM or client site) and how often you come into an IBM or client office. This includes employees who had been given a temporary exemption at eight Research and Systems sites deemed business critical. At this time, testing for COVID-19 will not be allowed in lieu of vaccination.

    If you have not yet been vaccinated or received the second dose of a two-shot vaccine, you should get fully vaccinated now so you comply. If you need to request an accommodation based on medical or religious reasons, you are strongly encouraged to do so by November 8, 2021. Requests submitted after this date may not be reviewed by December 8, 2021, and could result in you being placed on an unpaid leave of absence and/or losing IBM badge access until it’s been resolved.

    Complete entire vaccination validation process now
    More than 20,000 of you have now started the required vaccination validation process we shared last month. Complete the process now to verify your vaccination status and comply with the new requirement.

    Review updated FAQs
    A set of updated FAQs are available with additional details about our U.S. process and deadlines. If you need help with the validation process, please use the #return-to-workplace-tools Slack channel.

    As I have said on multiple occasions, we follow the science when it comes to the pandemic. While the best vaccines are highly effective at preventing hospitalization and death, it takes a coordinated campaign to stop a pandemic.

    Thank you for continuing to support each other, our clients and our business. I am very proud of the work IBMers have done during the global health crisis.

    Arvind Krishna
    Chairman and Chief Executive Officer, IBM

        • Let’s not forget who he replaced. You pointed out how IBM suffered through Akers who almost killed the company. Gini Rometty lead the next decline leading to Krishna where the stock price dropped in half, along with moral and productivity. That email just proves the suck that is left at what was once a great place. My friends who still work there tell me what a hell hole it is now with this culture. Most can tell me to the day how long they have left before they pull the plug.

    • I’m surprised that there wasn’t a lot of sentences saying that taking the jab was completely voluntary. My company did. Probably on the advice of lawyers. The company should be sued for adverse health effects.

  7. Very astute observations. I’m glad someone else sees corporate “training” for what it is. And calling bullshit credentialing out.

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